22nd Apr 2014

Anonymous asked: Hi, I love your blog btw. I'm recovered (I guess?) but I want to lose some weight in a more healthy way and all the things I've read up on say that in order to lose weight you have to burn more calories than you take in, does this apply to your daily amount of calories or does it only apply to the extra calories you eat? Sorry if this is a stupid question.


I must be honest with you, first of all - no truly recovered person seeks weight loss. Ever. A recovered person lives life day by day, leaves the world’s disordered societal expectations behind, and actually deals with any insecurity they may experience (as opposed to just running away from it by deciding to lose weight). 

What has led you to decide to change your shape? Fear of others’ view of your body? Stress? Feeling like you aren’t good enough? Something else? Remember that weight loss never solves emotional troubles - in fact, it only makes them worse, as diets can never heal the heart. Weight loss does not make you happier, prettier, stronger, better - our sick society would have you believe that, sure, but in your right mind you know none of these things are true, right? Weight loss makes you thinner. That’s it. Thinner does not mean better. Thinner is just… thinner - that really is all. Likewise, dyeing your hair makes it darker, and wearing heeled shoes makes you taller - that’s all. Remove the sick, hidden meaning the words “thin” and “fat” have in your mind, and recognise that “thinner” is not inherently better, just like “fatter” is not inherently worse. Changing your appearance will not fix your life. Not now, not ever.

What are you seeking from weight loss? Acceptance, confidence, happiness? These things can and should be found in ways that have nothing to do with restricting your food - finding them that way will not only make it last, but it will also heal your soul along the way. 

Before I forget, here is a quote from this article by Gwyneth Olwyn - the seven signs of true remission from an eating disorder are:

1) You look forward to gatherings and celebrations that center on food. Like all those without an eating disorder, you indulge happily and do not compensate either before or after the event.

2) You have no forbidden foods, unless of course they could actually kill you (think peanut allergy).

3) You are a force for moral absolution. Your relationship with food is a morality-free zone and it has far reaching influence on those around you, not to mention yourself.

4) You experience your body, and every body, as a miracle every day. You marvel at the healing of a bruise. You stop to watch your fingers flying over a keyboard and are amazed. You see form and function and the innate power of the body.

5) You understand on a cellular level that “savoring” is a state of transcendence and transubstantiation. Transforming food into life-giving energy is freaking phenomenal!

6) You feel connected. While many with eating disorders can feel strangely energized and alive in a state of extreme energy depletion, they rarely feel connected in that state. In fact, they feel a high in the disconnection. Connection is actually an ambivalent state and you are able to hold the ambivalence with appreciation. It is not always joyous, supportive or healing to be connected to others. But you are ok with that.

7) You are fluid. [You are flexible.]

Do not focus on weight loss. Do not focus on “healthy” weight loss (such a thing is impossible, as food restriction with thinness as the goal will never end well). Do not focus on weight loss, full stop. Let your body be, and fill your life with things you truly love. Like I said - leave the world’s disordered societal expectations behind, leave numbers behind, leave fear of “fatness” behind, and watch yourself grow. It won’t be easy, and running away from your troubles will be tempting sometimes - weight loss will often seem like the solution, when in reality it never is - but don’t give in. Life without all of this is so much better, I promise you. Best of luck, my dear - I hope you figure it out.

- Kate / kelixir

22nd Apr 2014

Love these tips for an “emergency care wall.” What would be on yours?


Love these tips for an “emergency care wall.” What would be on yours?

21st Apr 2014


did a little research on benzodiazepines and the brain and thought i’d share with you folks on here in funny power point form. hope it’s informative and entertaining!

18th Apr 2014

This is my body, and I live in it
It’s 29 and 12 months old
It’s changed a lot since it was new
It’s done stuff it wasn’t built to do

I often try to fill it up with wine
And the weirdest thing about it is
I spend so much time hating it
But it never says a bad word about me

This is my body, and it’s fine
It’s where I spend the vast majority of my time
It’s not perfect,
But it’s mine.

17th Apr 2014


(Source: fleeten)

15th Apr 2014


Another amazing video. It’s a bit more dry and technical than it is inspirational. However, it makes an excellent (and not often discussed) point about how in treating all other illnesses of the body doctors have images of these parts (images of hearts, lungs, arms, legs etc) to see what the problem is and exactly what they need to treat, but that when in treating mental illness psychiatrists base their treatment (giving medication) off of symptoms, rather than actual real physical evidence of what the problem is (images of the brain) so it’s like throwing darts at a dart board so to speak. It advocates SPEC imaging and is definitely worth the watch.